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Look For Warning Signs If You Sense Your Teenager Is Being Abused

All around the globe, one in three women have been hit, beaten, abused and forced into having sexual relations at least once throughout their life. In most cases, the abuser was their partner or a close member of the family. As you can see, domestic violence is a big problem no matter where you go.

If you are a parent and are worried that your teen is involved in a dangerous relationship, it's important to know the warning signs so you can take action if you truly believe she is being abused.

Sings That a Teen in is In a Violent Relationship

1. Change in Attitude-

You may notice that your teen's attitude will become very quite. You may start to notice your teen becoming withdrawn from things that she normally used to enjoy and love. If your teen was once before happy and upbeat and she's in an abusive relationship, you may start to see that completely turn around.

2. Shuts Off Friends-

You may start to notice that your teen stops hanging out with friends and spends all of her spare time with her partner. She probably won't even call or text her friends that often. This is because he is controlling her relationships.

3. Change of Look-

Your teen may start to change the way she dresses. She may start wearing long-sleeve shirts and pants even when the weather isn't cold to cover up any marks or bruises.

4. Bruises-

You may notice that your teen has strange bruises on her body and comes up with odd excuses for them.

5. She Can't Make Decisions on His Own-

You may start to notice that your teen always feels the need to check with her partner before making a decision on anything someone asks her to do. She starts to act more unsure of herself and anxious.

1 in 5 teen girls that have been in a relationship, have confessed that a boyfriend has threatened to hurt them or themselves if they had said that they wanted to break-up.

We see domestic violence in all kinds of relationships. Rich, influential and powerful people can get caught up in the abusive behavior as well. An example of this was very public a few years ago with the headlines that singer Chris Brown had beaten up his famous partner, Rihanna. Thankfully, Rihanna exhibited strong behavior and went straight to authorities after the incident happened. She had the strength to leave Chris which was a good example for young adults worldwide.

If you have gotten into trouble for domestic and have been sentenced to an intervention program, there are online domestic violence courses that you can take. Taking an online domestic violence course will help you learn better ways to deal with your anger and see the importance of not harming your partner. This may be easier to do than attending an actual group as you may feel uncomfortable with speaking about what you did in front of other people.

If you are suffering from anger issues that are motivating you to cause harm to someone you care about, it's important that you get involved in a program that will help you deal with these problems before it’s too late. Programs will help you to overcome and stop the cycle, so you can move on and become a better version of yourself. A domestic violence online course will surely help you get you the help you need.

Is Stalking Considered Domestic Abuse?

The term “stalking” refers to repetitive harassment in the form of written or verbal threats, following someone, unwanted phone calls, emails, instant messages and text messages, vandalizing of personal property and sending of threatening letters to name a few.  With the advancement of technology, stalking has become part of the daily lingo, as it has become easier to go online and find out information about another person.  Unfortunately, it has grown into a huge problem in modern times. Studies reveal that around 1.5 million fall victim to stalking every year in USA in one way or the other. In addition, 75 percent of those are stalked by someone they know. Technology has also impacted the field and 25 percent of victims are stalked using a form of the same.

Stalking is considered a form of domestic abuse in such cases as a current or former partner, household member or family member harasses or threatens another member of the household in one form or the other, as mentioned above. Women are most often the victims in these situations.  An example of stalking related to domestic violence may include your former intimate partner following or watching you at the new place where you have moved, without your permission.  Or, when a husband monitors every e-mail, phone call, and text message you receive, again without your approval.

Laws against domestic stalking have two parts. The first is the anti-stalking law and is a part of the Violence Against Women Act. It is a crime to travel across states, tribes and countries with the intention to intimidate, harass or injure a household or family member when the concerned person faces the fear of injury or death to herself or himself or to a member of the family.  The cyber stalking law takes into consideration the use of the telephone and internet to put a fear into the mind of the victim.

The first and most important thing to understand here is that stalking is a form of domestic violence that can take an ugly turn if preventive measures are not taken immediately. Do not accept it under any circumstance. Filing a case against the person is the correct thing to do. In this situation, both victim and the stalker would need to appear in the court to put forward their side of the story. Evidence plays an important part in this situation and can provide you the necessary relief.

If you are involved in a case of domestic stalking, it is important to document the incidents and report the matter to the police. DVLO or Domestic Violation Liaison Officer would help you out in the situation. You need to keep details related to date, time, name of witness, place and what exactly transpired. In case of cyber stalking, keep emails, messages, faxes and letters sent to you.  You can apply for a Protection from Stalking Order, which would restrain the defendant from stalking you. In addition, it is always better to formulate a safety plan for yourself and keep a list of emergency numbers ready with you.

In case you have been accused of stalking as part of a domestic abuse case, you will most likely have to take a domestic violence class for retribution.  Taking online domestic violence classes can be a perfect way to fulfill the court's mandate. They are inexpensive, easy to understand and you only need a computer with an internet connection. You are not required to go anywhere and can take it from the comfort of your home.  You will learn why your behavior has been inappropriate and unsafe and how to stop the behavior for good.

What Are Forms of Domestic Abuse?

Domestic abuse is generally a pattern of aggressive behavior that is directed at partners, children, elders and siblings to gain control over them.  Women have a much higher chance to be on the receiving end of domestic abuse then men and are often afraid to tell anyone due to their partner’s intimidating threats.  Domestic abuse does not necessarily have to be purely physical, it takes on a variety of forms.  If you are a victim of this type of abuse, it is important to report it to authorities for your sake and that of any children or elders involved as well.

The following are some of the forms of domestic abuse in the home that are considered to be crimes:

Sexual violence

This form of abuse includes forcing someone who is either mentally or physically incapacitated and may not be able to defend themselves.  Children are usually victims of sexual violence. The perpetrator may do this by inflicting fear in the child, manipulating the child due to their naïve nature or by using the influence of drugs.  Sexual violence could also include marital rape. 

Psychological violence

This is whereby the perpetrator uses words and actions to instill some form of fear or a feeling of unworthiness in their partner. The partner may undermine their partner with derogatory verbage like name calling in order to make them loose their esteem.  In other cases, the partner may be denied access to basic things such as isolating them from other people, forced imprisonment, harassing them, harming their pets, refusing them food and access to medical care.  The perpetrator may also instill fear by using black mail like threatening to release inappropriate photos of their partner or by threatening to physically harm them. 

Financial Abuse

This form of abuse happens when a partner takes complete control of the family finances at their own pleasure.  This including controlling the way their partner spends money, forcing the partner to account for every dollar spent, and refusing to pay the basic bills which they had agreed upon. This kind of abuse is meant to make a partner become financially dependent and undermine their sense of self-worth and independence.  

Why you should take domestic violence classes online?

Classes can be taken as a result of a court order or for self-improvement purposes.  If you are someone interested in truly changing your own behavior and creating a healthier, happier life for those around you, these classes will help get you on the right track.  If you are beginning to have a sense of empathy, taking these classes are important especially to the ones that are suffering.  They are easy to enroll in.  Just a click of a button next to the length of class you are interested in, and you are on your way. 

The classes are clear, and designed to be interesting and informative.  The topics discussed are divided into chapters which you can drop-in and out of at your own convenience.  The computer will hold the spot you were last at.  At the end of the course, there is a final exam.  With a 70% or better, you will pass and receive a Certificate of Completion to show to the authorities.  This document proves you have completed the class online.  Feedback from students overwhelmingly shows that they are happy to have taken the class and it has changed their life!

How Domestic Abuse Affects Children

When people hear about domestic abuse they think about physical violence. However, it does not necessarily have to be physical. It could be verbal or emotional or a combination of all of them.  The results that it has on the partner that is being abused can be quite detrimental and can make them scared, confused, fearful and angry.  However, domestic violence does not only damage the partner being abused, but it also effects any children living in the home. If the person that is being abused fears that something harmful might happen to them, then it is best to get away from the abusive partner and take the children with them.

If the individual chooses to accept this behavior and stays in the abusive relationship, the effects on the children are serious and can be life-threatening.  Depending on the age of the children, the short term effects of domestic violence might vary. The following are some of the effects that domestic violence has on children:

 1)     Young adults may turn to drug dependency to mentally “escape” the situation.

 2)     They might experience stress-related illnesses such as migraines, stomach ulcers and insomnia.

 3)     They might show cruelty to animals as a way of having power over something.

 4)     They may feel ashamed or embarrassed and withdraw from friends and family. 

 5)     They might have guilt and feel blame for the violence in the house.

 6)     An increase in regressing to old childhood habits such as bed wetting and thumb sucking.

 7)     Display destructive or aggressive behavior.

 In the long-term, children growing up around domestic violence display the following behaviors:

 1)     As an adult they may turn to drugs and alcohol dependency in order to cope with the violent memories. They might do this so as to get away from the stress and depression that comes with seeing one of their parents being abused by the other.

 2)     Adult children might also develop emotional problems. This might include getting stressed or depressed and this might interfere with their mental development.

 3)     They might also succumb to anxiety.

 4)     The children might lose trust in adults. They may grow up to develop poor relationships with other adults due to the fear of being abused.

 5)     The children might not get their nutritional needs met because of parental neglect which will contribute to their overall health as they grow up.

 6)     Boys who witness domestic violence are more likely to batter their spouses when they get into relationships.

 7)     Research, on the other hand shows that daughters who witness their mothers being battered in a relationship are more likely to stay in abusive relationships when they get into one.

8)    The children can be harmed in the relationship especially if the abuser abuses both the children and the spouse.

Studies show that some of the long-term and short-term effects of domestic violence can be significantly reversed when there is intervention from police, social workers and educational programs. There are online training courses about domestic violence that can help abusers reform their behavior. Classes clearly explain to offenders how they are negatively affecting those around them.  They teach how to better manage anger, how to develop empathy and what the risks are of continuing the abuse.  Classes are available online at the click of a button and a certificate of completion is awarded at the end of the course if it is taken for a court mandate. 

Stopping Domestic Violence Begins With You

One out of four women in the United States has suffered from domestic violence.  Women between the ages of 20 -24 seem to be at the greatest risk of being a victim of this violence.  It doesn’t matter if you are White, African American or Asian; all races are equally susceptible to this behavior.  While women used to try and hide this abuse to protect their partners, or cover their own embarrassment, cases are increasingly being reported to authorities.  Maybe this is because the Violence Against Women Act has been effective at creating new and more serious punishments for domestic violence crimes.  Basically, women finally have a place a turn that will give them the support they need to get away from this lifestyle. 

Some women may not realize or know if they are truly being abused.  They might have misconceptions that the way their husband or boyfriend is behaving is how every relationship is.  You might think that your husband has the authority to control whom you see and don’t see because he is after all, the head of the household.  You might think that his threats to hurt you or the children are not serious, but just his way of reminding you that you need to stay within his guidelines of how to behave.   However, this is considered emotional abuse and should not be tolerated.  

Furthermore, there are so many couples that just overlook hits, punches and violent altercations as "just our way of arguing" or "tough love". This is a horrid misconception and overall twisted way of thinking. No matter how heated an argument gets or how frustrated you may become with your lover or yours spouse becomes with you, escalating a verbal argument into a physical beating is never a sign of true love. It is exactly what it appears to be and what it is charged as within the judicial system - domestic violence.  Now that this fact is clear in your mind, this is what you need to do:

1) Call the Police

Do not hesitate to get the police involved. If you are the victim of the domestic violence, you need to take the appropriate action now and get it documented through your local police precinct. It is okay to be afraid and is completely understandable. But, you do not want to wait until it's too late to let them know what is going on.  If you know of someone that is a victim of domestic violence, then be a true friend and make the emergency call that just might save his or her life. 

2) Get Out of the Situation

You are not just going to stand in a lion's den, especially after you have already survived the first bite. You are going to do whatever is necessary in order to get out of there as fast as possible. This is the same exact line of thinking that you need to have when it comes to domestic violence. If you are the victim, get out of there as fast as possible. Do not think too long about what needs to be done. If you think long, you think wrong and will eventually rationalize your way out of making a life-saving decision to leave.

3) Seek Help From Friends and Family

Confide in someone you trust about the abuse.  You shouldn’t face this problem alone.  Create a support network that will be there for you when you decide to leave. 

Domestic violence is a problem that is not going to solve itself or just go away on its own. It can only be stopped if we take the necessary action to stop it. Domestic violence may start with the other person in the relationship, but it can only end with your strength to stop the situation. 

Ifyou are abusive and find yourself unable to control the behavior, then you should seek help as well.  Take a domestic violence class online to give you the tools you need to overcome this angry behavior.  Think of the possible consequences of your violence and get help now.

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